ACCOMMODATE - TO PROVIDE FOR, ADAPT, ADJUST, MAKE AN ADJUSTMENT
If someone mentions accommodations for our loved ones, we might think along the lines of bathroom modifications or wheelchair ramps. However, an accommodation does not necessarily need to be complicated. Your loved one was having difficulty walking over several months. When you made an appointment with her internist, he referred you to an orthopedic specialist. After an examine and an MRI, the doctor determined your mother's lower back had severe arthritis. To accommodate or make and adjustment for your mother, the doctor prescribed a walker with wheels to take the stress off your mother's back and legs along with mediation to help control the pain.
Have you ever thought of all the times you have tried to figure out how you were going to accommodate your loved one? And every time you thought "It's not going to work." It does. You don't know how you will ever manage to get your dad to go with you for Sunday dinner. He doesn't like to go and usually comes up with an excuse to cancel. This time you thought fast. You brought along your daughter, Lucinda, to pick him up. When he saw his grandbaby, your dad had a huge smile along with tears streaming down his face. Then she went up to him with a hug and held his hand. He couldn't resist his granddaughter. Your little girl was the accommodation you provided for your dad to lift his spirits. After you thought about it, you realized your dad needed more accommodations or adjustments like Lucinda to brighten his life. You want your father over for dinner on Sundays and realized he stopped going to church when he stopped driving. Your wife and kids all overwhelmingly supported the idea of taking your dad to church and then having him for the afternoon. This adjustment changed your father's life. He had something very special to look forward to every week.
Pop and Lucinda
When my mother goes out, she goes with my husband, Jack and me, in my Escape. She likes the car because she is able to get in and out of it. She uses a wheelchair, and she is able to stand just to transfer to get in the car, on the edge of the seat and then push herself all the way up. I had a Taurus X and when I traded it in, I had to purchase another car with seating height similar to accommodate my mother. I told my sales rep, Brent, who I have been working with for about 15 years, that we needed to find a vehicle that my mom would be able to get in. We went through all the cars and checked them until be decided on my silver Escape. Every time we pick up my mom, she tells me what a pretty color and how comfortable the car is for her. So taking the time and having a patient sales rep., like Brent, I was able to find a vehicle, to adjust to my mother's situation.
Elena worked as a legal assistant for twenty years until she was diagnosed with MS. She had to take a medical retirement because of the severity of her condition. Her husband, Peter, worked as an electrical engineer, and averaged ten hour work days. That meant there were evenings Elena did not see Peter because she was already in bed. Finally Elena asked Peter to make some adjustments to his schedule. They figured out what days he could leave earlier and finish his work at home. He talked to his manager about leaving work at 4:30 instead of 7:00 three days a week with the agreement he would finish any assignments at home. This accommodation with their schedule worked. Peter and Elena were able to go out for dinners and spend time together.
As caregivers, we are continuously thinking of creative ways for making accommodations. You can go the traditional route of reading an accommodation book but you may be overwhelmed by chapter two. Instead watch, talk with, listen to, and learn all you can from - other caregivers, employees working for home health agencies, individuals in the medical and mental health field, people in the rehab field, and your loved one. Research information about accommodations on the internet. Check out the accommodation website - JAN. Share your ideas with others. Then when you take out your accommodation books, you will have a better understanding. The books give us wonderful examples and information especially if you are doing a modification. But it's fun to come up with 'out of the box' accommodations and share them with others. That's how we all learn.
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